How to Start a Divorce Without Having Any Regrets?

Divorce is a complicated process that requires thorough preparation emotionally and physically. It is not only about a certain life period that will make you busy and overwhelmed with emotions, but more about life-turning decisions you are to make and the changes they will bring in your life.

Table of Contents

So, instead of regretting marriage and focusing on your past, you’d better move on to initiating a divorce and processing to your happy future in the end. Consider your situation to make the right decision and plan your divorce well with some of the following tips and strategies.

What Things to Consider Before Getting a Divorce?

The decision to divorce or not cannot be an on-the-spot one. Instead, you need to assess your situation deeply and get a hundred percent sure that your choice of marriage termination will change your life for the better. Here are some points for you to consider:

Hesitations – when divorce is on the horizon, you have to win your inner battle and agree with yourself that the marriage termination is the best resolution for your family situation. Otherwise, your life will be poisoned with regrets after divorce and mournings about the past. So, if you still have some uncertainties, find a way to sort them out before you set on the divorce process.
Feelings – in case you still have some feelings for your spouse, it may be a sign you should have another try in fixing your marriage. Or at least you can discuss your feelings with your partner or therapist and make the respective decisions.
Emotion-driven decisions – never make any crucial choices under stress, when you are through a difficult period in your life, or when you cannot think straight and are guided with your emotions. As a result, when the emotional tornado passes, you may regret your decision. So, wait for a little until your life settles down so that you can go after the top sensible option for your family and marriage.

Starting Divorce Process

Once you decide in favor of divorce, it is time to think about how do you start the divorce process. You are not limited to but can take the further steps to initiate the marriage termination and guarantee success from the very beginning:

Get your finances in order – divorce itself and life after it can become a serious financial challenge. So, economic stability is the must-have point before you begin any official processes. Save for your divorce, but not limit your monthly waste significantly; otherwise, it may have a negative impact on the spousal support if you will be assigned with any. Improve your credit history to have a financial backup plan. Quit any joint accounts and loans so that you are at peace about your financial security during the divorce. Adjust your personal and family budget so that you can manage your life independently during and after divorce.
Choose your strategy – you should clearly understand the tone you want to set for your divorce proceedings. The best choice is an amicable divorce. It will save your time, money and let you and your partner decide your life conditions on your own within the applicable law. In contrast, if you are or your future ex is not ready for cooperation, get prepared to bring your case to court.
Make crucial decisions – whether you are after an amicable divorce or not, you need to settle your mind on divorce and marriage-related decisions. Discuss with your spouse or create your own vision on visitation, custody, debts and assets division, spousal support, and so on. This way, you will know what to stand for and what to expect at the end of your marriage. To ensure you’re making the best choices for your situation, consider seeking advice from a joint custody attorney. Their expertise can help you understand your rights and what to expect at the end of your marriage.
Hire an attorney – in most cases, it is strongly advised to hire an attorney for the best possible aftermath of your divorce. Even if you are dealing with an amicable divorce, it is good to at least consult an expert. But if you are getting ready to defend your rights in court, you will hardly do it on your own. So, take your time to pick out not exactly the best one but the most suitable expert for your case. Consider working with Jacque Law Divorce attorneys, or ones of a similar professional nature.
Start the divorce officially – once you are ready with all the preliminary work, access the official website of your state or visit the clerk’s office to get guidance for further steps. This way, you will be instructed on what papers to gather and where to pass them to initiate the divorce process officially.

Don’t hurry to jump into the divorce process until you get equipped properly. Make your decisions as to your strategies in divorce, prepare physically, emotionally, and financially, and collaborate with the experts to succeed with the divorce case without any hassle.

Uncontested vs. contested

This refers to the two primary categories of divorce proceedings, each with distinct characteristics and implications. An uncontested divorce occurs when both spouses mutually agree on the terms of their separation, including property division, child custody, and financial arrangements.

One of the key reasons for this is that most divorces are uncontested, which means that it isn’t disputed by the other party, so an uncontested divorce generally leads to a smoother, faster, and more cost-effective process, as court involvement is minimal. In contrast, a contested divorce arises when the spouses cannot come to an agreement on one or more key issues, necessitating court intervention to resolve disputes. This often results in a more protracted and emotionally taxing procedure, as well as higher legal expenses. The choice between uncontested vs contested divorce depends on the level of cooperation between the parties and the complexity of their circumstances, highlighting the importance of clear communication and negotiation when pursuing a divorce.

When it comes to divorce, you have to be definitely confident that you are heading the right way to grab the top benefits eventually.

Be sure to consider:

Understanding outcomes – when you think that divorce is the best solution for your family hurdles, consider the outcomes as well. Dwell whether you are ready to handle finances, household, care about your children, and manage troubles alone, without your partner by your side. If that is the way you want your life to proceed, then file for divorce without hesitation.
Checking out alternatives – hold in mind that divorce is not the only way out for marriage hardships. Visit a family therapist, cooperate with a relationship coach, and try separation first. There are many options you can test before you end up your marriage irreversibly if nothing works.

Getting Over Divorce Proceedings

To get your marriage finalized officially, you need to cover common divorce steps. The rules and peculiarities may differ from state to state, but steps are usually the same.

File for divorce – the first thing for you to do is to file for divorce. Get and fill out the divorce petition online or on paper and pass it to the local clerk’s office. Filing for divorce means that you have begun your divorce process officially.
Serve your spouse – the next step is to let your spouse know that you want a divorce. You can do this orally in advance so that your partner has a chance to get physically and emotionally ready. But the process of serving your spouse displays the official point of your divorce procedure moving on. You can serve your spouse via any third person or hire a professional server or sheriff to deliver the papers. Another option is to pass the docs via mail. When serving your partner, you pass the similar papers you have handed to the clerk’s office.
Get the response – when your spouse is served, you retrieve the respective notification and hand it to the officials as well. Then your partner has 30 days to fill out the proper forms and file the response.
Settle the deal – then the best scenario for both of you is to cooperate. This means you should opt for an uncontested divorce and aim to create a divorce settlement agreement together. You have to discuss and decide on the divorce and post-divorce conditions, write them down, sign them, and hand them to the court. To optimize the process, you are strongly advised to cooperate with the relevant experts, including the mediator, financial advisor, divorce attorneys, and so on.

If you manage to agree on all the key points of your divorce, and the judge then approves your decisions, your marriage will be terminated soon. But if you and your partner cannot come to terms with any of the issues, then you have no choice but to hand your case to the court.

Preparing for Court Hearing

Just a few divorce cases go to court. Everyone knows that litigation takes much time, money and doesn’t guarantee favorable outcomes for any of the sides. But if you have no other choices, preparing for divorce court hearing is the best thing you can do. Consider the following points when getting ready for court hearing:

Cooperate with your attorney – you can imagine the court process and its outcomes in any way you want, but you will never reach your aim if you don’t have an experienced and trustworthy attorney to cooperate with. The divorce attorney will get you familiar with the lawful side of your situation and explain to you all the possible scenarios so that you can create the best strategy together.
Collect papers – you won’t manage to finalize your divorce process in court successfully unless you back up your standpoint with the respective documents. Your attorney will supply you with the list and help to collect all the necessary papers for you to be properly equipped during the court hearing.
Switch focuses – within all the divorce hassle and stress, your primary task is not to get too focused on your marriage termination process. Care about your mental wellness and get someone to support you throughout the case.
Control your emotions – whether in court or during the preparation, never let your emotions guide you. Try to keep your head cool and make wise decisions. Realize that your impulsive actions may spoil long years of your and your family’s life after divorce. So, learn some calming down methods and handle the divorce processes sensibly.
Know what to expect – study the standard scheme of the court hearing. Get ready to answer the common divorce trial questions from the judge, your attorney, and your spouse’s attorney. They may refer to your background information, details on your marriage, your residence proof, things you agree and don’t agree with your spouse as to your divorce outcomes.

If you put in decent efforts, sooner or later, your litigation will come to an end, and you will receive your final divorce decree to regulate your life after divorce.

Stay optimistic and be ready to agree on the amicable settlement at any point of the litigation so that you can reduce the time and money wasted and have a beneficial impact on the divorce outcomes. Mind that no matter how fair the judge is and how the law can play in your favor, the results may be not as pleasant as you expect. After all, the judge doesn’t know you as a person, doesn’t have enough time to discover the life story that is behind the divorce, and may choose to assign not the most comfortable living conditions for you and your family.

Marriage termination is never easy. It burdens you with the responsibility to predetermine the future of your family. This means that getting ready for divorce with your maximum efforts applied should be your primary concern. Think thoroughly, make sensible decisions, be open for cooperation both with your spouse and the related experts, and try to finalize your marriage with beneficial aftermath both for you and your soon-to-be-ex.

Once the divorce is finalized, it’s crucial to focus on moving forward with your life. One option to consider is changing your name back to your maiden name, which can provide a sense of renewal and a fresh start. If you’re a resident of Illinois, you can explore numerous options available to learn how to legally change your name. Reputable companies that specialize in legal name changes can offer you the necessary guidance and support to navigate the entire process smoothly.

Author Profile

Scott Baber: Senior Managing editor

Manages incoming enquiries and advertising. Based in London and very sporty. Worked news and sports desks in local paper after graduating.

Email Scott@MarkMeets.com