Things You Shouldn’t Do When Getting a Divorce

A divorce can be physically and emotionally exhausting regardless of your relationship with your spouse. That’s why it’s best to avoid doing things that can make the process more complex, challenging, and costly. According to experienced family law attorneys, here are some of the things you should avoid doing when getting a divorce.

1. Don’t Try To Do it Alone

The first thing to remember is that you shouldn’t try going through the divorce process alone. Maintaining a relationship with your soon-to-be ex-spouse can be difficult enough – add court filings and other legal processes to the mix, and you set yourself up for failure.

2. Don’t Lie To Your Divorce Attorney

On that note, remember not to hide anything from your divorce attorney. As experts in the field, they know how to deal with facts, whether they’re good or bad. Nevertheless, they can only help you when they know the truth. The last thing you want is for your lawyer to find out about hidden assets or drug abuse during a trial. If you’ve done some things you shouldn’t have, informing your lawyer gives them time to prepare. 

3. Don’t Use The Joint Account for Personal Expenses

If you and your spouse have a joint account, it’s important that you’re only using it to pay for your expenses as a couple. That’s because you’ll need to document (explain and prove) any expenditure from the joint account. If you end up using that money for personal expenses, it can hurt your credibility.

4. Don’t Hide Your Assets

If you’re thinking about hiding any assets not mentioned in the documents, you may want to reconsider. You’ll have to make a sworn statement about your assets. Therefore, failing to give full disclosure means that you’ll be held in contempt of court and face jail time. And if you fail to appear before the judge, it affects the chances of an equitable distribution of your marital assets.

5. Don’t Say Something That Can Be Used Against You

When the circumstances that led to your divorce are unpleasant, it can be impossible to maintain amicable relations. However, family law attorneys advise you to be very careful when making verbal statements or sending text messages to your spouse. That’s because any negative statement can be used against you. A word of advice: let your lawyers handle the communications if it’s regarding the case.

6. Don’t Forget To Take Care of Your Kids

When you’re caught up in the middle of the divorce process, it’s easy to forget about the most important thing: your kids. Remember that divorce can take an emotional toll on your children, so it’s important that you’re there for them and listen to what they have to say. It might be beneficial to seek child custody legal help to ensure their best interests are being represented.

You and your spouse should make an effort to remain involved in your children’s lives to maintain a sense of normalcy. This can include going to sports meets, parent-teacher conferences, piano recitals, and other extra-curricular activities.

Of course, at the same time, you and your spouse shouldn’t try to act as if nothing’s happening. As your children, they deserve to know, in the simplest way possible, that you won’t be together anymore. Needless to say, you should keep any unnecessary details out of it and avoid making comments that can instigate your children against your spouse.

7. Don’t Move In With Someone Else

Whether you’re already romantically involved with someone else or just want to start a new relationship, make sure to hold it off until your divorce is final. Before you move in with your new partner or introduce them to your children, consider the pros and cons involved. Doing so could give the court a reason to deny you alimony. Additionally, moving out of the family home could affect property division and child custody decisions. 

8. Don’t Get Pregnant

Speaking of children, being pregnant during the divorce can needlessly complicate the process. In some cases, it even affects the outcome of the divorce. If you’re pregnant, the court may focus on knowing who the father is and whether he’ll be paying child support. In the process, they may fail to make a proper decision as to how much alimony you will receive or pay.

9. Don’t Incur Extra Debt

Many people are under the assumption that all debt incurred as a couple will be split evenly between them and their spouse. Therefore, you may be tempted to take on additional debt, hoping that the load is divided equally. However, the court will likely issue an order that prevents you from taking on other loans. So, violating a court order can lead to that debt coming back to you instead of your spouse.

That’s why it’s best to hire a divorce lawyer to help you during the process. This is especially true if the other party is also lawyering up. 

10. Don’t Discuss Your Divorce On Social Media

For many people, discussing their problems and ranting about an uncooperative partner on social media can be cathartic. But this is limited to when your spouse forgets to take out the trash, and you want to complain about them forgetting your birthday.

During the divorce process, it’s essential that you stay off social media to avoid sharing any details regarding your activities. This includes your children’s activities and comments about your spouse or children.

Keep in mind that any content on social media can be downloaded and that screenshots of your activity can be used against you. Hence, most family law lawyers advise against posting on social media at all instead of adjusting your privacy settings.

Always Consult Your Divorce Attorney Before Major Decisions

While this is definitely a comprehensive list, it’s still better to speak with your divorce lawyer before making any decisions that could potentially affect the outcome of your divorce. As your legal counsel, they’ll have your best interests at heart and can inform you on what you should and shouldn’t do.